I think all long term travellers have a moment or two when they start to hate the very thing they love.
Travel turns in to a job, and like all jobs that you love there can be bad days or periods where you think why am I doing this.
And then you start to panic.
Because you have shrugged off the 9-5 desk job and responsibility for this, so if I don’t want to do this anymore then what do I want to do?!
These thoughts happened to me last year.
I had dreamed for years of putting my life into a backpack, the rest into boxes and to run off and experience the world.
I had travelled before but it was always on a timeframe so when I finally finished uni I saved up as much as I could for the big trip.
But to be honest for most of it I wasn’t really that happy.
Except for the 6 weeks I spent volunteering in the jungle in Bolivia with rescued wildlife.
I was so confused; I had wanted this for so long so why did I feel that I was just going through the motions?
Also in the two years since I had first gone South America had changed a lot in regards to how many people travel there now.
Two years ago when I told my family I had booked a ticket to Colombia, my uncle said goodbye to me and said he would never see me again because he remembered Colombia from 10 years ago.
Now though it seems that every gap year fresh out of high school student is travelling there.
I am fine with that, I think everyone should travel out of their comfort zones and experience new places.
Although it did make me suddenly start to find things less special when I turned up to a hostel to find only 18 year olds staying screaming at each other ‘oh my gosh I cant believe we are meeting again! What is it the 5th hostel we have run into each other?’
I started to feel lonely because I felt that many of the travellers I met were travelling in large groups and I had nothing in common with them.
I became disillusioned.
Luckily last week I remembered why I love travelling.
I have been staying in Yogyakata taking an Indonesian language course for a week.
There were six other students studying at the school taking up to 6 hours of one on one language classes daily.
Even though all of us were different ages, travelling to Yogya for different reasons somehow we all clicked.
A little bit of magic happened and it was honestly the most fun week.
The kind of magic that happens sometimes with groups of people who meet up randomly and all interest and intrigue each other.
I was reminded of it when it was my time to leave to travel back to my current base in South East Sulawesi.
I didn’t want to go, I was yearning and longing to stay one more week with everyone I had met at the school.
And this longing made me remember why I loved travelling.
An Italian dive instructor, an engineering student, a sustainable farming expert back from Afghanistan and a German nurse sitting her English test to work in Australia.
It is about capturing moments that you would never have anticipated and realising that they have been created spontaneously and will never be created again is something so special.
I am so glad that I travelled to Yogyakarta the dates that I did, I almost didn’t but felt that it was right for some reason.
It turns out that sometimes those gut instincts are there for a reason and threw me into the path of such interesting people who ran through rice fields with me, explored the ancient Buddhist temple of Borobudur and pursued batik art with me.
As great as Yogyakarta is, it was made even more special thanks to the people I met.
So here is to travel, and my rediscovery or reminder of my love and passion for it.